Halloween. The kids had a blast tonight. My teenager decided to not go trick or treating this year and went to her friend's house to hang out and hand out candy. She is the one who LOVES anything chocolate so I was really surprised she decided not to. My Dad has always liked Halloween and seeing the kids in their costumes, asking about their candy hauls. He usually phones to talk to the kids - not this year though. We've only talked once since Thanksgiving - and that was the Wednesday after I wrote about earlier. We hadn't texted since that night either. I got a text from him on Sunday asking if we were at Church - we were just on our way there. He said to have fun and pray for him. I told him I am always praying for him. He said he loved me. I sent him some pics of the kids dressed up... and the dog. My youngest was a lego block, middle was a taco and the dog was a mermaid. (Yes, I bought a costume for our dog this year. I was at Winner's today and it was on sale for $4). We had a good text conversation. He asked how I was doing and I said ok - to which he replied that I could talk to him now because he was being very positive for himself and for others. I told him I started a blog, that it was private and I'm not using anyone's names. He asked what a blog is. I know he reads another blog written by a man who has had LBD for over 10 years now so I told him that was a blog and that it's sort of like an online diary but that I won't be mentioning any names. He said, "Oh ok." The tone of the conversation was good. I asked him if he was being positive for real or just putting on the happy face and he said he was trying to be positive because he feels that is the only way things will change. He is setting some goals for himself and wants to try really hard not to make it hard for my mom. I told him I was proud of him - because I really am. And I really do hope that he is trying to be more positive. Maybe his cup is getting closer to half full... or a quarter full at least. Baby steps right? I really do want him to get the most he can while he still has more good days than bad. I was looking at my oldest daughter's phone last night and saw a group text between her, my middle and Dad. I'm glad that they are texting. As grouchy as he can be, Dad has a great sense of humor and always teases the kids... it made me happy that they are having fun text convos with him. He went fishing the other day and sent them a picture of the fish he caught. I'm really glad to hear that he went out fishing.
Tuesday was 21 years since my Grandma passed away - Dad's mom. The funeral was on Halloween. Dad mentioned that in one of our texts tonight and that he misses her. My mom told me once that she would sometimes hear Dad talking to someone in the bathroom, bedroom... wherever... and when he came out of the bathroom once after having a "conversation", she asked him who he was talking to and he said, "My Mom." That made me smile. In the midst of this horrible disease that is going to slowly take my Dad is this amazing blessing. How wonderful it must be to truly believe you are having a conversation with your Mom like that. What we all wouldn't give to have a conversation with a loved one who has died. I know it is progression of the LBD but I didn't see that as sad at all. It actually made me happy because I know that must have been so awesome for my Dad. There is joy in all circumstances - but we need to choose to look for the joy, to find it. We need to praise God in the midst of our hard circumstances. LBD may be one of the curses, but God gave my Dad a blessing that day.
